Monday, June 6, 2011

Blog Chain - Breakin' the Rulz


Today's my day on the Blog Chain and for this round, the lovely Abby asked:

There are SO many writing rules, but sometimes we have to break one or two, just to keep things interesting. Is there a writing rule you've broken on purpose? Why did you choose to break it? And if you want to post a snippet of your writing as an example, even better!

Ahhh...those rule-breakers :D I think I break them all every now and then :) But, like a few of my other blog chain buddies, I am sort of fond of sentence fragments. They just add a good sense of urgency, and extra oomph to the scene. As with everything, overusing them cuts their powers, so I try not to use them too much. But I think they can be very effective when used right.

And...something of mine to illustrate, hmm? Okay - here is a snippet of my current book, Treasured Lies :)

Her heart thumped in painful lurches. She tried to calm down. It was probably just a really big mouse. Or one of the cats? Perhaps the old place really was haunted.

She jumped as a muffled thud reverberated across the rafters. The faint sound of breaking glass had Min running for the exit. There was no visible handle on the outside so Min grabbed the edge of the door and pulled it closed behind her. She was careful to straighten the tapestry that hid the entrance. Backing away, she made sure there was no evidence of the room.

Footsteps.

Min froze in alarm.

Nearer…nearer…

It was probably just another student. Though that could prove problematic since Min wasn’t supposed to be out of bed. If she were honest with herself, she might admit that all the tales of ghostly lights and noises of late had her a little spooked. The footsteps echoed through the hall.

Min held her breath. She blew out her candle and pressed herself into the wall near the window across from the tapestry-covered alcove, half burying herself in the curtains.

The footsteps grew louder and stronger until at last they stopped a few feet from where she hid. An invisible hand reached out and yanked the draperies aside, letting the strong moonlight spill into the corridor. Min could make out the large, dark shadow of a man. She tried to keep silent. Her breath came faster, her heart beating in desperate time to her panic.

The shadow lunged.

~~~

:) Be sure to stop by Michelle Hickman's blog to see what rules she likes to break and check out Eric's tomorrow to see his rule breaking awesomeness :)

7 comments:

Sandra Ulbrich Almazan said...

A good demonstration of how fragments can effectively show tension. (And I used a fragment to say that, and I started a sentence with an "and." I'm quite the rule-breaker today! ;)

Eric said...

Great excerpt. I don't know 'bout rules (or breaking them), but that particular piece is well written. Nice job, Michelle.

Michelle McLean said...

Thanks Eric :) And LOL Sandra :D Actually, starting sentences with And is another rule I frequently break. A little too frequently sometimes LOL

Talli Roland said...

I love how you used fragments, too. I must admit I'm a bit too fond of fragments at times!

Matthew MacNish said...

You do have to know the rules ... but only so that you can break them on purpose, rather than on accident.

Mark Noce said...

Amen on sentence fragments! I love them because the mimic both human thought and speech patterns. Plus I always love to break rules whenever I can...but not without reason:)

Michelle H. said...

Ah, more sentence fragments. I love it! Nice excerpt!